Letter Format Find and Fix Exercise, Part II

By Caroline M. Cole

In “Letter Format Find and Fix, Part I,” readers had the opportunity to identify format and layout changes they might make to a sample letter to improve its appearance. This discussion examines how traditional American business letter conventions would enhance that document’s aesthetics. (Readers who did not see the earlier post can still download and complete the original exercise prior to reading this discussion of possible changes.)tools2

To reference elements and areas in the original sample letter that this discussion calls out for revision, you can download an annotated copy of last week’s letter; the numbers in the annotated version correspond to comments below.

1. Date abbreviations. A document’s date is often among of the least important information on the page, yet dates formatted with Arabic numbers and virgules (for example, 7/21/2013) attract more attention than otherwise, simply because numbers, punctuation, and symbols stand out from the Roman alphabet that dominates a letter written in English. Even abbreviating months (for example, Dec. 13, ‘13; Dec. 13, 2013) introduces formatting variations that can be distracting.

Dates should include the month, day, and year, but to minimize the attention they receive, you should write dates out in full (for example, July 21, 2013; December 13, 2013) both in the document’s date line and within the document itself.

2. State abbreviation in mailing address. Although the United States Postal Service (USPS) preferred that mail include the full name of U.S. states and its territories to minimize confusion, in 1963, the USPS adopted the use of two capital letters without punctuation as the official postal code abbreviation to accommodate the maximum 23-character line of most addressing systems in use at the time. By using the abbreviations recognized by the USPS, you can simplify inside address details, demonstrate a familiarity with format conventions, and ensure more accurate delivery of your letters.

3. Subject lines in letters. Subject lines are conventional in memos, as well as email messages that mimic the memo format, but they are unnecessary in letters. The subject line’s information would be more strategic as part of the opening paragraph, which serves to identify the overall purpose of the document; this shift would help declutter the inside address area and enhance the visual presentation. If the document’s subject is potentially negative, moving subject line information to the opening paragraph likewise contextualizes the topic in a way that may not be possible in a stand-alone subject line floating above the salutation.

4. Inside address/salutation consistency. Discussions often challenge the use of “Dear Sir” in a salutation as a potentially sexist reference when writing to someone whose sex is unknown. Because the letter is addressed to a male reader, Peter Karalis, the salutation “Dear Sir” does not violate trends in gender neutral-language; it does, however, introduce an inconsistency between the inside address and salutation references.

If the inside address were to include a courtesy or professional title (for example, Mr. Peter Karalis or Dr. Peter Karalis), the appropriate corresponding salutation would be “Dear Mr. Karalis:” or “Dear Dr. Karalis:” respectively, but since the inside address contains no title, the salutation should read “Dear Peter Karalis:” for consistent reference to the target audience.

5. Opening paragraph and list introductions. Identifying the purpose of the entire document, the opening paragraph cannot simultaneously function as a “lead-in” to the list; that is, a sentence or phrase introducing the following entries. Even if it were only a sentence, your opening paragraph should be distinct from internal paragraph content.

6. Format redundancies. Conventionally, italics is a published manuscript’s way to denote emphasis. Yet because italics was not always available in the early stages of manuscript preparation, writers needed to help typesetters know what information to configure as italics using the tools they had—the most common of which was the typewriter.

Because early typewriters used a moving cartridge and stationary paper roller, the only way writers could indicate which text to italicize in the final printing was by underlining; writers would type a line, move the cartridge backwards, and then use the underscore key to mark book and newspaper titles, emphasize words, and so on.

In the early 1960s, IBM introduced its Selectric, a typewriter with interchangeable “typeballs,” giving writers the option to type in various fonts—including italics—simply by changing the font element, thereby eliminating the need for writers who had an italics typeball to underline. Today, computers make italics available to the masses, allowing everyone to create typeset-equivalent manuscripts, making it unnecessary to underline information to convey emphasis.

If, however, you prefer underlining, you should avoid applying format choices that duplicate the effect. In other words, underline or italicize, but resist applying both format options simultaneously.

7. List entries. Lists, by definition, require at least two entries, with a maximum of five elements so that a string of decontextualized details do not lose the impact writers aim to achieve by calling out information in the first place. Because this sample letter’s first list has a single entry, it is possible to delete the bullet all together and move the information to the end of the previous paragraph, immediately following the colon.

8. Ordinals in dates. When writing dates, it’s unnecessary to represent the day as an ordinal; that is, a number representing rank, such as first, second, third… or 1st, 2nd, 3rd… . After all, people reading dates tend to use ordinals for the day of the month, regardless of whether it is spelled out (“September 15, 2013” is pronounced “September fifteenth 2013”). By removing the ordinal markers, your date references are more concise and, without the superscript references, visually cleaner.

9. Paragraph length. The longer the paragraph the more readers have to wade through information to find salient points; on the flip side, multiple short paragraphs can suggest sporadic, disparate ideas. A rule of thumb, paragraphs that run 5–8 lines are most reader-friendly. Of course there are always exceptions, especially in light of the fact that varying paragraph length can increase visual interest. Even so, by ensuring that paragraphs are visually inviting, you can increase the likelihood of readers engaging with all of your ideas.

10. Exclamation points. Exclamation points convey strong emotions—something that industry documents work to minimize given the stakes that may be involved. Yet even in cases that might justify an emotive statement, two exclamation points can suggest hyperbole and indicate that the writer must rely on superficial means to compensate for the absence of a formal, audience-appropriate vocabulary.

11. Headers. Headers can create visual interest and simultaneously offer signposts for readers to move quickly through a document, providing readers know what the header introduces. In this sample letter, the header “floats” between two paragraphs, and while readers might assume that headers always introduce the discussion that follow, it’s possible that the information actually links to the previous section, but was misformatted. For clarification, place your headers on the line directly above the information it introduces.

12. Lead-in determining list markers. Elements within a list can use bullets or numbers, depending on the context. Bulleted elements are not obligated to follow to any particular order, though a writer might arrange listed items in purposeful, strategic ways (for example, weakest idea to strongest idea; strongest ideas at the beginning and end of the list, and weaker ideas in the middle). In contrast, numbering entries suggest either quantity, sequence, or rank ordering.

Because this sample letter’s lead-in uses of the phrase “the following three items,” readers expect a numerical list. By making sure your list element markers correspond with any lead-in references, you demonstrate an attention to detail.

13. Bullet options. When bullets, rather than numbers, are most appropriate for listed elements, writers should be attentive to the bullets or symbols they use, for images can suggest messages the writer does not intend. Checkmarks, for example, can imply a “To-do” list, while unfilled circles or boxes can bring to mind Scantron tests or surveys. Smiley faces, apples, hearts, lightening bolts, chunky arrows, pointing fingers (like the pictogram in this sample letter’s second list), and other whimsical images can suggest “unprofessional.”

Some people use asterisks for bullets, but doing so can introduce problems. Although readily available on most keyboards, asterisks are often used in footnote references, so using them as bullets can confuse some readers upon first glance. The same holds for hyphens and dashes, which serve grammatical purposes.

Solid-filled circles are the most conventional bullets. For variation, however, you could use solid-filled squares or even diamonds, keeping in mind that the more your choices deviate from the familiar, the more they will stand out and, possibly, redirect an audience’s attention.

14. Hanging indents. To help readers quickly identify the start of each entry in the list, bullets should adopt a “hanging indent” format, whereby the first line of the entry starts ¼”– ½” off the main margin, and subsequent lines are indented to align with the first letter of the entry. In this sample letter, the list uses a reverse indent, requiring readers to spend more time than necessary hunting for the first word of each entry. By hanging the bullets in your lists, you help readers quickly find and review each point.

15. Closing paragraphs and list close-outs. Similar to item 5, which notes that a document’s opening paragraphs must be distinct from a bulleted list’s lead-ins, the document’s closing paragraph must be separate from a bulleted list’s closeout. This sample letter’s formatting suggest that the document ends abruptly after the last paragraph of the main text, which happens to include a list. By distinguishing a bullet’s closeout from the last paragraph of the larger document, you can bring appropriate closure to each segment of your message.

16. Information emphasis. As explained in item 6, bolding and underlining information simultaneously is redundant, but the additional format element—all capital letters—screams at the reader. Adding to this concern is the nature of the information being yelled: a deadline. Considering that readers often view deadlines in an unfavorable light, calling attention to a deadline with various format choices will most likely attract attention to potentially off-putting information before the reader understands the larger context. Here, then, is one example of how formatting can distract and disrupt the order in which a reader receives and, therefore, responds to information.

By considering which details your format choices may be emphasizing, you can make sure it’s information you want readers to notice first.

17. Block formatting. Business letters may adopt one of several formatting styles, including the full-block letter format, modified-block format, and semi-block format. Each style comes with its own conventions for content, alignment, and element placement. Therefore, mixing styles can suggest the writer is unfamiliar with format protocols—a message that can have unintended consequences among those who do know the conventions.

This sample letter begins as a full-block format, whereby all of the paragraphs, as well as the complimentary close and signature block, are aligned to the far left margin. By indenting the signature block, the sample letter suddenly shifts to a modified block format, which indents the letter’s dateline, complementary close, and signature block. Regardless of whether you prefer one format or the other, you should apply the particular format conventions throughout the document.

18. Signature. Writers should confirm content of the letter and use a signature to verify their approval of the information going out under their name. By not signing the letter, writers miss the opportunity to review a document for which they might be held liable. In addition, omitting a signature can suggests the writer is inattentive to details. By developing the habit of signing your documents, you can maintain greater control over the information that’s linked to you.

19. Reference initial order. The initials, enclosure notifications, and copy references at the bottom of letters and memos, when appropriate, should appear in the following order: identification initials (the initials of the person typing the document, sometimes appearing after the initials of the writer); enclosure notification information, preferably written out as “enclosure” or “enclosures,” but sometimes abbreviated to accommodate the names of each enclosure; carbon copy or, nowadays, courtesy copy references; blind carbon copy or blind courtesy copy reference information, if any; and, finally, post scripts. In light of this information’s sequence, the reference initial details in the sample letter are in inverse order.

20. Blind copy reference. Blind copies are documents sent to an individual without the primary audience’s knowledge. In this sample letter, Blaine Chandler is receiving a copy of the correspondence, presumably without Peter Karali’s awareness. The “bcc:” reference lets Chandler know to keep the letter’s contents confidential.

This reference was flagged as a potential concern, depending on the recipient of this copy of the letter. If Blaine Chandler is the recipient of this letter, the “bcc:” reference is appropriate. If, however, this copy is intended for Peter Karali, the writer should remove references to the blind copy in circulation.

As noted in the instructions for this exercise, there were at least 10 format-related items that could be enhanced simply by applying traditional letter format conventions. In addition to the 20 items explained above, we can call out the fact that some readers might react to a smaller-than-conventional type size (the sample letter uses 9 point Times New Roman), which requires readers to strain their eyes more than necessary. By using reader-friendly typefaces and type size, you can enhance the reception your document receives.

Another concerns is the fact that there are two bulleted lists on a single page. Although the first bullet isn’t a list per se, writers should resist including more than one list on any given page, lest readers find themselves bouncing between the lists to see where to focus first. (Contrary to what people may think, readers do not always read documents in a linear, top-to-bottom manner.) By minimizing opportunities for readers to bounce around the page, you can promote a more sustained engagement with your document’s content.

* * *

In reviewing this list of elements to revise, you may find yourself agreeing or disagreeing with the explanations grounded in American business letter format conventions. In comparing these elements against your own list, you might also notice different or additional concerns. Regardless of the items you called out, and those you didn’t, ideally you are more cognizant of the ways format can affect how others read and interpret messages.

Reader-oriented content should be able to overcome even the most unflattering first impression, yet understanding where and how a document’s appearance can disrupt the reception of a message (or even ourselves) can help us be more strategic in the format and layout choices we make, ensuring that our document’s appearance contributes to, rather than detracts from, the exchange.

Working toward Areté
What were your experiences in going through this exercise, or how does a document’s appearance affect the way you receive information? Share your thoughts in the space below.

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